(Mom)ents

Well, Tomorrow may or may not be the last working day in Russia until the 14th which is when I believe they reopen following their "Holiday." It seems they celebrate the New year just the same as us; however Christmas falls on January 7th for them. This has to do with how their calendar has changed over the years. Not ideal for us but kind of cool all the same. So, I will stay busy over the next few weeks getting things done around the house...among the chores: Christmas stuff has to come down...is this not the worst chore of the whole year? Does anyone out there agree with me? I mean how fun to get it all out and decorate but where is the fun in putting it all away?

All of our goodies from Christmas morning have found new homes and our dumpster is on the rebound. I was a bit worried we might have to make a trip to the dump but not so. And so we move on to more of the same...home projects..are we ever done? We went to The Home Depot yesterday...got new toilet seats (yee Haw!) ordered some carpeting for our family room...can you believe how expensive this stuff is? We also got some paint for the family room and we are going to paint it (I know, what a crazy thing to do with paint)...again! The green was doing nothing for me...so, we will go back to my "go to color of choice." Beige. The carpeting is a shade or two darker and with the blue couches, I will find some nice burnt orange accent pillows and such and we will hang all our Auburn paraphernalia in this room...I think. You can never be sure.

So, I just finished watching videos that families have posted on Youtube. I cry through them all and I long for the moment when it is me...The moment we get the call," you have a court date." The moment the judge says,"yes, she is your daughter, congratulations." The moment I hold her and she is MINE. The moment I leave the orphanage with her in my arms. The moment she takes her first steps on American soil. The moment I tuck her into her bed. Have you ever noticed the "mom" in moments?

My theme song this week is God of Wonders by Third Day. I am holding to the wonders of my Lord. The maker of Heaven and Earth; Who can deny He is the God of wonders? So, although I am not counting on it, I am still praying for a miracle...that we might hear news of a court date tomorrow. And if not, I will continue to pray that we would hear soon after they reopen two weeks from now. Two weeks is not such a long time. is it?

So, I will not worry about what I cannot control...tomorrow is 12/31, the eve of 2008...

"...But seek His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well." Luke 12:31

He provides, ALL that we need...and all the moments in between. Happy New Year!

I Am Not Afraid!

"Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, 'Give them up!' and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.' Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth...Yes, and from ancient days, I am He. No one can deliver out of my hand. When I act, who can reverse it?" Isaiah 43:5-6 & 13

I feel as though our children in Russia and here and everywhere, waiting for their forever families are the captives in this chapter and the Lord is going forward on their behalf like He did so many years ago and although people and procedure can make the journey difficult, no one can deliver out of HIS hand. They cannot stop what He has put in motion...I find that today I am really resting in the Lord and is timing. I continue to remind myself that He has got this in His hand. I go into this period of silence knowing that although the Russian people will be on holiday for the next two weeks, the Lord will still be working 24 hours a day/7 days a week for all eternity.

Please be in prayer with us over our documents. We still need the CPS letter and we are close to completing the FBI clearance that we found out about 1 1/2 weeks ago and this morning I got a call from a woman at DCF who came in off her vacation to try and help us with our DCF letter. (CPS letter) I was so excited that she called even though it was 7AM...just to know that we may have finally found someone to help us secure this letter. also, she seemed to be a Christian as she said the Lord would bless us and so again, I saw how He sees fit to use this process to bring His people together for His purpose.

"Our God is an awesome God, He reigns in Heaven above, with wisdom, power and love...."

Feeling the Breeze

Today I am wondering why no one has received a court date this week. Russia is still open for another 3 business days. Then, the closure that all adopting parents who are in the wait have dreaded. Two weeks of complete silence. I am trusting in my Lord for a miracle. It is most likely not the miracle I have floating in all the empty space between my ears but a miracle none the less. I am in prayer that several of our families that have already met their children will receive word of a court date before they close up for their holiday. I mean they need to have some things on the calendar when they reopen, right? Of course.

Of Course, just because I haven't heard doesn't mean that no families from Kras have received court dates or referrals. I mean it isn't in the rule book that every family that hears something has to notify me...I'm not sure why? Oh, that's right, there is no rule book for Russian adoption. Oh, and, I might not be the most important person for them to contact with their big news...can you imagine?

I have found that I am once again starting to feel the stress of this process. Will it ever end? Will I have everything done? Will there be enough money? You can see by the ticker at the top that we have been at this process quite some time. Most of you know that anyway. I am ready to be home. You know how home is where the heart is. Well, my heart has been in two places for over two years now and I am ready for it to once again be whole. I have so much to do around my house. Unfinished projects that I want checked off before Ellie comes home so that my focus can be where it should be. And the money...well, the cost of this process just keeps going up with each additional document request and delay. Papers expiring, additional time in country means additional nights in hotels and meals...etc, etc. and we are now looking at a fee schedule that is close to $7000 more than when we started the process. So, all that being said...

"Do you not know, Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

And even as I was typing this, a miracle from the Lord: a woman from the DCF here in FL called to tell me that the woman who will write my CPS letter will contact me on Monday when she returns from her vacation. Praise God! Thank you Father! I am putting my hope in you and already feeling the breeze up here with the eagles.

Christmas Trivia

Trivia: How many children and how long does it take to completely trash one room?

Answer: 3 children 10minutes.

We had an eventful day. The kids were up around 2AM. I know I got up extra early on Christmas as a child but I am pretty sure it was never this early. Since Adam does everything last minute, he was asleep on the couch and woke up to little feet dashing about. After sending them back to bed, he climbed in and was woken again at 6AM. We lounged about and waited for the third to awaken and then trudged out to open stockings. After stockings, we had to get ready to go to Adam's grandmother's house and have Christmas there.

We arrived home about 1:20 PM and got around to opening all the loot from Santa around 2:00. The kids got what they wanted although not all of it this year. We decided to go more low key this year as last year was completely ridiculous. Still, it was a lot of trash to be disposed of. We had a nice meal with my parents, my grandmother and my uncle. Then we just played outside on Rusty's new bike and Ruthie's new skates for a while. Bed was early and oh so nice.

Today, we cleaned up!

So, I woke with a new energy to get things done around the house to prepare..."nest" as they say...I am going to finish up projects and I vow to have my Christmas stuff down on New Year's Day...Call me on it girls! I have a room to decorate! I can't wait to post pics of Ellie's new room...Hoping to have it done by Feb 4th...I hope you all had a blessed Christmas!

Happy Birthday Jesus song syncronized to Christmas lights

Jesus is MY reason for this Season!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JESUS!

Good Times

Another busy weekend...Like it is December or something....We started off Friday night with a practice for Ruthie's gig on Sunday and then a birthday party right after. We woke up Saturday and spent the morning kind of being lazy around the house which inevitably results in the house being a mess. We went to see Alvin and the Chipmunks (cute movie) with a few friends and then raced home to get ready for Saturday night service. After that, we had a Christmas party to be at...had a great time! This morning we got up early and to church a little bit late???? I don't know why that happens...it is one of Lori's laws. I'm not a late person at all but if I have too much time to get things ready, I will be late. Ruthie got to sing a solo in the late service...she was so cute it was unreal and I was so proud...not sure why, she didn't get it from me:0)

After church, we came home and cleaned up for a bit. Then, I took Ruthie shopping at the Dollar Store so she could buy gifts. So cute, she had little cards she had made under the tree, each one had money in it. One of them had a $10 in it. I had a little talk with her about how nice it was to want to give and that instead of giving all her money away to the family maybe we could go to the store and she could pick something out for each person...So, we did and she was cute walking through the isles asking me, "Mommy, do you think Daddy would like this?" I'm thinking, "how could he not like a word search book from the Dollar Store?" How cute! Anyway, she did her shopping and tomorrow, I will get pics of her wrapping everything because she is outside playing with friends right now.

Backing up a few days, Ruthie was not around Friday after school and the boys were kind of quiet out in the living room. One at a time they would run into my office for tape or scissors. I went out to check on them and I see they are wrapping "presents" from around the house for everyone in the family. Flip says to me, "Mommy, this one is for you." I look and I had to hold in the laugh but I couldn't resist running for the camera. Please look closely at what is inside the package! Yes, that's right, it is a package of travel size toilet paper. I left them to it so I think we will find some amusing surprises under the tree this year. But how sweet! We are off for Santa this evening and then home for a family Christmas movie night...Good times!

He's There

Today, was a good day. After the FBI Clearance news dropped like a bomb into my world, I was a little miffed to say the least. I am now back in control of what senses I have left. I called today, exactly 24 hours after the FBI received my packet to see if it had made it through the ANTHRAX screening and was being processed. "I was told I could call 24 hours after receipt to verify my prints were being processed????" She says, "Well, that's not how it normally works but let me check." And, after being told 3 times yesterday by different people at the same office that no priority was being given to anyone right now, our fingerprints are in fact being given priority and they are in process!!! Huge sigh of relief! So, hopefully those will be on their way back to me either tomorrow or right after Christmas. I guess they deserve a day off like the rest of us:0)

Flip and I journeyed out into the land of the lost...that is what I call people who are still attempting to shop at this point. I had to pick something up for a last minute gift exchange. It wasn't too bad out there. Flip needed everything and wanted to make sure that Santa knew. I had to explain that Santa stops making toys about a week before Christmas so that he has time to package and wrap them all. Deep stuff...oh, to be a kid again.

Anyway, 5 days til Christmas...While I am so excited because it is such a special time of the year, I can't help but feel a little sad...so, I will share this...it came from a friend via email. If you have seen it before, read it again. It really came to me at the perfect time. Enjoy!

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian
youth's rite of passage?

His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a MAN.
He cannot tell the other boys of this experience because each lad must come into manhood on his own.

The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could become a man! Finally, after a horrific night, the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold.It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm.

We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, our Heavenly Father is watching over us,
sitting on the stump beside us. When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him. If you liked this story, pass it on. If not, perhaps you took off your blindfold before dawn.

Moral of the Story:
Just because you can't see God, doesn't mean He is not there.

9 Blissful Years

Just wanted to take a moment to wish my husband Happy Anniversary! We have been married nine years today! I'm going to go ahead and brag on him...you may want to turn away because it might get a bit disgusting and sappy up in here!

I have known Adam for almost half of my life. I met him just after my 16th birthday at a pool where he was swimming in a meet at the time (it was a blind date set up by his aunt, Laura...thank you so much Laura, we have all this because of you:0) He walked up to me in a speedo, WITH a bald head I might add. There is something to be said for a swimmer's body, however, it makes you completely ignore the bald head!

Anyway, Long story short...we dated from there on...my first date led me through college to the alter with one man who is my best friend. He consistently puts my wants before his own. He does everything within his power to help me out with the kids and around the house and he shows me his love with all the little "things." All this is not to say that we are perfect, we are not. But, we are grounded in the Lord by Adam's spiritual leadership, and I am thankful that God saw fit to put him in my life...Happy Anniversary, Adam...I love you!

In His Time

Today we got an email from our agency and of course, there is an additional document needed. Russia would now like to have a background check from every state either of us has been a legal resident in for the last 10 years. Granted, we have only ever lived in Alabama and FL during that time but due to the fact that I have been finger printed 3 times, checked by the local and federal Government in addition to DCF, this news annoyed me. In fact that is putting it mildly.

But, we will do it...and we have. I did not want to hunt down the proper people in the state of AL so I opted for the federal fingerprint check. I went straight to Adam's office and picked him and his driver's license up...we proceeded directly to the Sheriff's office...did not pass go, certainly did not collect $200. We got fingerprinted and then I came home to fill out all the info and get that in the mail. When I get that back, I will have to mail it to WV where the FBI headquarters are and it will get apostilled there...it would be too easy if they would just forward it on for me*sigh* Then, it will be on it's way to Russia. Of course, all this after I just got 16 other docs apostilled including our lab reports and chest xrays which I am certain will have to be redone...they are only good for 3 months. And, we will redo it. Please be in prayer that these documents will not be held up, that they will not request any more. Today I just felt like every little document request is just one more delay and it separates me from my daughter just a little longer. Starting Monday, Our agency will be closed until the day after Christmas and then when they reopen, Russia will be closed. I feel this sense of urgency that all should be in it's place before then. It will not because there is no possibility of getting the FBI checks back and then in the mail again and to the Agency by Friday. All that being said, Please pray that I will remember that this is all in the Lord's hands...His plan is perfect and when it is time, she will be home.

It only takes a glance at my pictures and I know that she is worth all this...

8 YEARS

Wow, 8 years looks beautiful. This weekend was a busy time...I know, when are we NOT busy? Friday night we had our small group. Saturday morning we split up..Adam took the kids to a birthday party, I went to a baby shower...then we got back together for an annual Christmas party we hold with a few friends. We hurried out of there to get ready for Adam's office Christmas party. On Sunday, we went from Church to the roller rink where we celebrated 8 years of a blessing. And then it was divide and conquer, once again. I had to get some shopping done...went on a marathon spree that lasted from 4-midnight and I am proud to say that I finished up at Target this morning...I don't think I have ever gotten all my shopping done in less than 24 hours. Adam took the boys to his boss' house for a "thing" and my mom took Ruthie from the party back to church for her "thing." I'm tired...Not a good way to start the last week before Christmas...oh well.

On the adoption front, I got our next set of docs in the mail today to Tallahassee. My mother in law (thanks, Andy) gets them and drives into town to have them apostilled and then mails them back to me. This saves me about 3-5 business days of waiting...and at this point, I don't want to wait. ($603.00 on adoption related postage to date) I would like to have those docs to my FC before they shut the offices for Christmas (24-1) so that they can be on their way to Russia. Russia doesn't shut down until 1/1/08...so, if we can have our papers in for court before then, I hope that we will hear something pretty soon after they reopen in mid-January or, sooner:0) I am still holding out for a Christmas miracle.

Prayer requests are: 1) Smooth paperwork: getting it, shipping it, accepting it. 2) Quick court date 3) God's peace: the waiting is aweful.

Gifts for My Maker

In this season, we go out and buy gifts for everyone on our list...but do we stop to think about what we can give to our maker? My friend Heather sent this to me and I wanted to share it. You can always count on Max to put things in perspective...I hope it makes you think...Lori

Following the Star

by Max Lucado

Suppose you could give a gift to Christ, what would it be? How could you possibly select a gift for the One who not only has everything, but who made everything? The Wise Men did. They can be an example to us. In addition to the gold, frankincense, and myrrh, they gave the Savior some gifts we can give him today: their hope, their time, and their worship.

The wandering wise men gave Jesus their hope. When everyone else saw a night sky, this small band of men saw the light. The sight of the star sparked a desire in their hearts that send them packing. They went, seeking Jesus.

When night comes to your world, what do you see? The darkness or the stars? Hopelessness or hopefulness? Sometimes, just as he did so long ago, God uses the darkness to reveal his stars--"The light shines in the darkness" (John 1:5). Give God your hope for Christmas.

While you're giving, give God your time. The wise men did. Before they gave God their presents, they gave their presence. It's likely that these men traveled as long as two years before locating the prince of heaven. Before that one incredible moment when they knelt before Jesus, the wise men spent many moments, months, perhaps years searching, in anticipation of that meeting.

Just as the wise men devoted themselves to seeking the Savior, so can you: "You will seek him and find him when you seek him with all your heart" (Duet. 4:29).

And when they did find him, the wise men gave Jesus another gift: their worship. Men of wealth, influence, and intellect: what did they do when they saw Jesus? "...they fell down and worshiped him" (Matt. 2:11)

Worship. It's a gift that extends to the giver as well. Through worship, we come to see God more clearly. God invites us, through worship, to see his face so he can change ours. In worship, we simply stand before God with a prepared and willing heart and let God do his work. And he does. He wipes away the tears. He mops away the perspiration. He softens our furrowed brows. He touches our cheeks. He changes our faces as we worship. The wise men sought the child of God, just as God seeks his children. "The Father is actively seeking such people to worship him" (John 4:23).

The gifts of hope, time, and worship. Three gifts the wise still give.From One Incredible Moment:Celebrating the Majesty of the Manger Copyright (J Countryman, 2006) Max Lucado

One down...

One to go...We got our Petition to Court! This means we can file for a court date! We still need the Child Protective Services letter (before we travel) so keep praying for that! Once again God knew I needed this at just this moment...My girl, Dinah knows what today has been like...I literally got off the phone (crying, surprise) with her and there it was in email! I have just been feeling so emotional and frankly, overwhelmed. I am usually so organised...would likely have 95% of my shopping finished by now. We were hanging lights outside at 11pm last night! This just doesn't happen with me! Ok, I admit, I was not going to do anything but the tree this year but for some strange reason, I just felt like this was the year we all needed a little more! So, there are lights and bows and wreaths gracing the front of our home and I confess that when I pulled in the driveway this afternoon, it was a welcome sight! Thank you, Lord...for everything you have done and everything you are about to do!

Logan, the Sky Angel Cowboy!

Adam forwarded this to me today and I sat and cried for a good five minutes after listening. It made me realize that God understands being separated from a child. And to think, He did it for you, and for me.

Wonderland

No, not Alice...Just me wondering:

I am full of questions and at a point where I wonder what is the point in asking? Our Agency had "several" court dates this past week but did not specify where and when. I thought I had heard that there were 3 in Kras but I don't know the specific dates for all of them or when the families traveled for the first trip...I don't want to know these things because I am nosy...I mean, I am but I really just want to know so I can see what the trend will be...what to expect for ourselves.

I wonder when we will get our Petition to Court...This little document is key to filing for a court date...although most of our docs for court are already in Kras, they will not issue a court date until we have submitted this. It has to come from the facilitator. Once we get it, we will fill in the rest of the info...notarize, apostille, yada, yada...

I wonder if there is any possibility for us to have her home before the projected 3-4 months...You know how they say, "time flies?" Try being in my shoes. On one side of the coin, I can hardly believe we are about to ring in 2008 and on the other I feel like April will never get here. I just want so badly for her to be home on her birthday, March 31. Not just home but settled.

I wonder if she remembers us...is the nanny showing her the pictures we left? Are they pushing the buttons on the bunny so she can hear our voices? Will she recognize me when next I see her?

I wonder if all the mothers waiting to bring their children home ache just the way I do? Does it hurt this much for all of us? Are they all as confused as I am?

I wonder if I will ever understand what the mother of this precious little girl must have suffered at the moment she signed her life away...could I ever be that selfless? Will she ever be the same? Will her heart ever heal?

Ok, you get it, I am sad today. We are one week home...it has been 9 days since I have seen my child. I continue to remind myself that the Lord has seen her through nine months of pregnancy and 20 months on this earth and that He continues to hold this child in His protection. She will be fine. But I wonder, will I?

This morning, one of the other waiting moms posted a verse...

"Ah, Lord God! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for you." Jer. 32:17

He's got it under control...no need for me to wonder.

It's Begining to Look alot Like Christmas

Well, we got the tree finished at about 11 PM on Friday night...so tired. It was fun though, it always is. The kids want to hang all of their ornaments and they all end up in one place...sometimes three or more to a branch so when they are done, I go and move them all around. Only one got broken this year, by me of all people and would you believe it was a new ball that I bought in Kras while we were there! SO glad we will be returning soon. I will just have to get a new one!!!

Everyone usually poops out long before the last ornament is on the tree so I end up finishing it by myself. This year, Ruthie hung with me to the bitter end. She is getting so BIG! I can hardly believe it is already eight years since she was born. Our tree looks beautiful this year...I am trying to picture it stuffed for four children next year, oh my goodness!

I ordered my picture ornaments on line this year and because we have pics of our girl, was able to order one for her also. That was pretty cool. I cried...surprise! They should be here this week and I can't wait to hang them up. I have all of the gifts for our parents bought, not wrapped; but I have not bought one thing, no not one for my children yet...YIKES! Is it really only two more weeks until Christmas?

The kids all had little Christmas shows this week...2 little songs each...literally ten minutes in and out but they were cute...especially Flip who really got into it this year and Rusty reminds me of Adam more each day...he had all the motions down for his songs but didn't want anyone to laugh at him so he was the ONLY one not doing them...but, he looked really cool just standing there:0) It's sad how early we become aware of the opinions of others. I hope I can find constructive ways of teaching my children not to care what others think but to be true to God and themselves.

Had our home study update Saturday afternoon. This went well and was actually kind of nice to sit and visit and tell her all about our trip and the baby. When she left we went to Adam's boss' house. They invited us for dinner to celebrate Ruthie's 8th birthday and she had a cake and cooked Ruthie's favorite foods. Her party is not until next weekend so this was nice for her. On Sunday, we ran from church to one of Adam's cousins houses to eat lunch and visit and then ran back to church...BUSY!

The most fun was Toys R US...every year we take the kids and wander the isles and they make their Christmas lists...Flip is so easy...cars this, cars that. Ruthie really looks at everything and picks carefully because she knows she will not get everything so after we're done, she ranks them. ( so her mother) Rusty, he wants everything and thinks it's no big deal because Santa makes it all and it doesn't cost him anything. I'm sure there are a few lessons that need to be learned there???? Who can dispute the magic of Santa? So, we are off and running toward Christmas, staying busy and trying to catch our breath. WOW, I really rambled and had no rhyme or reason to this post...oh well...I can't always be a poet.

I just know I am so thankful that we can celebrate the birth of our saviour...

Only cause my wife asked me to

Hello everyone. Adam here. I thought I'd fill in with some comic relief and a little more explanation of the less obvious parts of our trip. The only problem is, I'm not all that funny.

Let's start with the very beginning of our trip, a simple flight from Tampa to Atlanta. This a no brainer. You hop on a plane, sit for an hour and a half, get some peanuts and a soda, do a couple of "Easy" crosswords and word searches (because I can't solve anything harder), and arrive in Atlanta to prepare for the difficult flight. Easier said than done. About the time we get our peanuts and soda, we hear this really loud, weird noise. I thought nothing of it, I mean planes normally make loud, weird noises, don't they? Lori had caught a glimpse of the steward and stewardess though, and was sure that they hadn't heard that noise before because of the looks on their faces. I reassured her, and our new friend, a woman who was traveling to Atlanta on business that everything was fine. Our new friend doesn't like flying all that much, which doesn't make her all that much different from Lori. After the pilot informs us of a failure in the hydraulic system, she starts to wig a little bit. He reassured us that there was nothing to be alarmed about, and we still had 2 fully functional systems. 2 out of 3 ain't bad, right?

I wasn't worried at all, that is until we started our "final descent". I didn't realize how final this descent almost was. I have flown to Atlanta dozens of times and am familiar with the landscape around us when we land. Well, after several minutes, I never see what I expect. After we start to circle the same area for about the 3rd time, I start to get nervous. I am trying to stay calm for Lori and our friend, but I know something is truly wrong. The looks on the other passengers' faces only solidifies my fear. No one is calm. The stewardesses are nowhere to be seen, and we never get another announcement until we get on the ground. When we land, everyone applauds and cheers, this is when Lori STARTS to cry, after we are safe??? That "minor" hydraulic failure we weren't supposed to worry about had caused malfunctioning of our landing gear and ability to steer it. Who knows how they finally got the landing gear out. I pictured some guy down there kicking at it to try to deploy it. And the circling was to line us up just so, cause there was no steering us out of trouble. Alright, who's ready to board another plane now? Not me!

Well after that ordeal, it couldn't get any worse right? WRONG! All that circling made us over 45 minutes late getting to the gate. We had roughly an hour before our connector to Moscow left. These flights typically board 45 minutes early. Our plane has landed at the T Gates, and we need to get to the E Gates. It is 5,000 feet between these two gates, about a mile. No problem, we hop on the mass transit trains and poof, we're there in 5 minutes. So we're waiting in line to get on, and I hear over the loud speaker, "Ladies and Gentlemen, we apologize for the inconvenience, but the trains have been temporarily shut down."

Great. I look up to the countdown clock, though and it says we only have 2:15 until the next train. No problem. After sitting there for several seconds, I look back up and it now says we have 2:29 until the next train. Obviously, there is a problem. We don't have time to wait around so Lori, prepare to run a mile in record time in order to make our plane. As we take off, I hear a lady standing nearby protesting aloud how there is no way she can run a mile. Sorry lady, we can't piggyback you. We are both carrying loaded backpacks, mine weighing only about 60 POUNDS!! We are both wearing brand new boots too, mind you, and they certainly haven't been broken in yet. Off we go. It is roughly 1000 feet between each gate. We stop and look as we arrive at each gate, in hopes that the system is back up. No luck, the clock is still counting up. Several minutes later, we are sweating profusely, out of breath, and limping from the new bruises and blisters formed in our new boots. And to get a nice slap in the face, we spot that lady getting off the train right before we arrive there. Oh well, we make it for the final boarding call and are off to Moscow! WOO HOO!!!!

Stay tuned for the my next issue: Death by BO.

Looking Forward

My girl, Debbie encouraged me with a clip from "Facing the Giants." I thought I would post a song that always makes me feel better and never gets old. Isn't it wonderful to know that in our darkest, saddest, lowest points, and all the times in between, God is there to raise us up.

I'm taking a break from the blog this weekend...have to get the tree up and we have a HS visit on Saturday.

Standing on my God's shoulders and looking forward to all that He will do.

Thick and Thin

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise." James 5:13

This morning I had to go to the doctor's office to pick up the lab results that we will carry with us when we go back to Russia. On the way there, Flip was sitting in the back asking random questions like he always does in the car. I was answering them like I always do, in-the-car. And I started thinking about how sometimes God is so mysterious and at other times, He is so obvious. What has this all been about?

It occurred to me that I have been leaning on God so much more these past two years than I ever have in my 20 some-odd years of knowing Him. It also occurred to me that even still, when I have been riding the highs of this process, I have taken Him for granted. I have thanked Him casually and moved on. This morning the light came on. This has not been about bringing a little girl home. Although that is the end result, it hasn't been about that...

I would say that Adam and I have always been "pretty good Christians." For those who put us on a scale and measure us all on the good deeds factor: We have always been regular attenders on Sunday and Wednesday, worked in the nursery, served in AWANA, attended our ABF, occasionally sung in the choir and played in hand bells, given our tithe. We had an acquaintance with God. I kind of knew He was there and we talked like we were supposed to, sometimes I even listened.

This morning I realized that over the last two years God has been transforming our family and He has used a little girl on the other side of the world to do it. Adam joined a men's Bible study about the time we started all of this and it has had a profound affect on his walk with the Lord. As a result, his attitude around the house and in everything , most importantly, our family's walk has changed for the better...our acquaintance with the Lord has deepened into a relationship that grows each day...and looking back over this time I realize that this is what it has been about. Teaching us to lean on him in the good and the bad because it so easy to forget that He is the reason for the good.

Who flipped the switch? I had been riding the high of knowing that we had submitted 95% of the documents we needed for court while we were there to expedite trip two and then I talked to our FC. We are still waiting on 2 docs that are completely out my control...and so, I turn back to God. I woke up a 2AM and could not get back to sleep...I just can't turn it off. So I start talking to God..."God, please let those documents arrive soon." And in the course of the conversation, I realized I was telling Him how to do His job again when He has never left His desk. Each time I go there...forgetting to lean, telling Him what to do, I am knocked down a peg. You'd think I'd learn.

So, today I thank God the sun came out and the light came on! I am turning it all over to God, again:0) I am casting my burdens on Him! It feels good.

Life Without the Void

Once the babies were gone from us, we were taken into the director's office. It was a nice room...looked like it could be in any American office building. The four of us sat down and they started with us...told us she had gained another pound and that she seemed completely healthy. Any concerns they may have had regarding anything to do with her health were no longer an issue. They gave us more information about her parents including their names and her full name. They also showed us more pictures of her and asked to see pictures of our family. They were very excited over the photo album I made online...I would have loved to have seen their reaction to one of my scrapbooks. When they were finished they allowed us to ask questions and then moved on to the other family.

That first night, we ate at a little pizza place called California pizza. It was the Russian version of American pizza...does that make sense? It wasn't American but they think so, we let them think it:0) It was good. We went back to the hotel and we slept. Adam slept very well, I was up at about 2 AM and that was it for me for the night. We were picked up at about 8:30 in the lobby and our first stop on this morning was the orphanage.

Again they brought her in and just handed her off to me and left the room. She seemed pretty comfortable but again needed time to warm up to Adam. She was wearing a little blue dress that was a bit too big but it was again ironic to me that they felt they needed to present her to us. She looked adorable in the blue...her eyes are like huge pools. If you have seen the pictures, you know. Anyway, we snuggled for a little bit and then I tried to move onto the floor and get her interested in some toys...no go.

Right about now, they came in to tell us that they would have music classes in the room and that we needed to stay on the other side. So, we got up and moved! They were so cute! The little girls had so little hair and such enormous bows! They sang and danced while one of the nannies played the piano and 3 more showed them the hand movements. This was both good and bad. While we enjoyed being able to see this part of her day in action, it was a distraction for her and she was preoccupied with watching the older kids sing and dance.

She did finally take a bite of one of the fruit snacks...I snuck it into her mouth! Once she had that first bite, there was no going back. She polished off three snack bags! We got great pictures of her with her cheeks stuffed full of them. We again played the "shoe on/shoe off" game. She loves to have her feet touched, tickled and rubbed. I got her to giggle this time by pulling her close to me and then letting her fall back quickly. We got some great shots of her smile. Our time was up too quickly and again they came in a got our babies before I was ready. This time, it was a "so long for now." I thought I would be ok and I am but I confess I cried a bit off and on for the next few days. It just didn't seem right to have to leave my child there; To have her taken from my arms and be dismissed.

These next few months will be filled with celebrations of Christmas and birthdays, a new year, our anniversary and Valentine's day. All the time there will be someone missing from the pictures and my heart longs to fill that void. Please be in prayer with us over the next month that our documents will move smoothly through the process, that they will accept them and not ask for more. That we will receive a quick court date and bring our daughter home...and mostly, that God will receive all the glory.

Looking forward to celebrating a birthday on March 31...without any voids.

Child of my Heart

So, a little more about our first visit...Vika looked like she had just woken up and she felt very warm. She also must have been very confused and so I just sat with her and we snuggled for about 30 minutes. During this time, the translator kept telling us we could play with any of the toys in the room. I just wanted to hold my baby. Adam took pictures and some video. When she started to stir, I tried to get her to play with some toys in hopes of Adam being able to inch his way over to her. She has had very little exposure to men and she was a little afraid of him. What finally broke the ice for him was the fruit snacks that we brought for her. I'm not sure that she knew they were food. She took them out of the bag one at a time and moved them into Adam's hand. Then, one at a time, she moved them from Adam's hand back into the bag. This happened about 20 consecutive times during which he was able to sit closely to her on the couch.

I had also brought a few outfits to try on her so we could get a feel for what size clothes we need to bring to get her home. She was so cute with this! It was very obvious that the kids are used to being dressed quickly and that they are expected to help with the process. I went to take her shoes off and she stuck her foot out and pointed her toe. So, I told Adam who was sitting across from us to help her change her clothes. She let him take off her shoes and her clothes and put the new outfit on her...by the way, she is 20 months old and the 12 month outfit fit her well with a little room to move. She is so tiny! Once we got her back into her dress, she kept sticking her feet out to Adam so the "shoe on, shoe off" game started.

Next we moved to the "bunny/bracelet" game. We showed her the bunny we made for her and she really liked it! She kept touching the arms and you could tell that her little mind was trying to figure out how that stuffed rabbit was talking like these two new people. It was very sweet. She also noticed my bracelet. The one I wear that has her name in the prayer box! I took it off and she held it for a good while and just looked at each little bead as if she herself were reciting the 23 psalm. I thought how special that she should be so attracted to the one piece of jewelry that had connected me to her during our long wait. All too soon our two hours was up and the nannies returned to collect our babies. She went willingly and my heart squeezed. She wanted to keep the bracelet and so I must get her one because it was the one thing that was mine that she wanted; even still, she already has my heart.